night. that way you will never miss "on the record." up next the o'reilly factor. good night. tonight on "red eye." >> coming up on "red eye." do robot animals taste as good as real animals? the debate you will forget we had. plus, how does the vice president feel knowing that magic mike 2 will not be rated nc-17? >> how in the hell could that have ever been allowed? >> and finally, has belgium been secretly building an army of killer geese? our year long investigation finally bears fruit. none of these stories on "red eye" tonight. >> wow. let's welcome our guests. brains and charm were a crime she would be a felon serving life without parole.
i am here with a first time guest. i said tonime and not tonight. she is forbes.com contributor terry sheffield. tonime on red ume. she is an awful person. it is joanne with the waive. and america's top moper, tv's andy levey. and he is funnier than a whopey cushion. he will be on a show wednesday at 11:30 eastern on what we like to call mtv2. >> other people call it that. >> a block. the lede. that's the first story. greg, it is me, your inner money log. i will try not to let the audience know where the bodies are buried. >> thank you, voice. could what you chug make you good with lugs? it is time for tonight's edition of america's hottest new game show --
>> is this sexist? >> that was nice. a new ad for a woodford reserve is taking some heat after the "mad men" premiere. listen and look and look and listen carefully. >> when i see a man drinking bourbon, i expect him to be the kind who could build me a bookshelf, but in the way that one builds a ready made bookshelf. he will already know where the lumber yard is. he will get the right amount of wood without having to do math. he will let me use the saw and not find it cute that i don't know how to use the saw. >> god i hate that voice. the website the brazer called it stereo typical and the manager of a cnn food blog, there is a job, tweeted, quote, i was with this woodford commercial until the narrator was like, tee-hee,
how do you use a sword. he was going to hand her the saw. they say, quote, we recognize people were talking about it and it was not our intent to offend. it is about celebrating the bourbon drinker from a number of different context. is this ad sexist? we asked some baby sloths. >> i would like to have one of those in the middle of the night have one of those crawl up my naked chest. i don't know what i would be. i would be happy and terrified. san drew, they are claiming --
andrew, they are claiming the ad is sexist to women because they can't build their own shelf, but it assumes it can't be men. >> and they have long flowy hair. why are those your real men? these girly dudes with the long locks. since when are surfers drinking bourbon? >> that's true. >> if i am a woman which i am not, but if i was a woman i don't want a guy who will buy me or build me a bookshelf. i want a guy who will get me a kindle. this is 2014. get technology. who is buying all of these books except for the book "not cool" which you should all buy. >> thank you, sir. >> on whatever device. >> i read mine on my abbicus. and wouldn't you want a guy who could afford to hire a builder? i don't understand. what do you make of this? >> it is sexist toward men. she says she wants a guy who doesn't have to do math. basically she is wanting him for his muscles. that's totally sexist.
i don't know about you, but i don't fantasize about a man building me a bookshelf. i fantasize about massages and walks on the beach. and i have a kindle. >> and walks on the beach. let's do it. >> walks on the beach. that's stupid. nobody likes that. you know what a walk on the beach is? when you see somebody doing it and it looks good. and then when you go and do it it is like, it is stupid. you stand everywhere. >> you step on a shell and the water is cold. and it is like -- then you are like thinking, i don't want to be here. i would rather be in my hotel room. >> why are you pissing on my dream. >> that happens to be my dream. >> you can read more about this on my blog, nature is dumb. >> by the way, that's a beautiful blog. >> we will gladly take walks on the beach if you want to take walks on the beach. i am serious. we won't say we refuse because the water is cold. >> the sunset, the breeze. >> it is something men do for women even though they hate
it. >> and then they want sex on the beach, and not the cocktail. we are wide enough to know that. >> trust me, you are not. i was just on spring break and i just saw people not having the cocktail. >> i don't think the ad is sixist, -- sexist, but it seems confusing and weird. >> i actually enjoy the commercial. it says bourbon is a luxury. it looked like a banana republic bleak ad meets perfume orca loan. i wanted to buy it because it seemed like luxurious. if you are a real man, like guys in "mad men" this is the updated version and you will drink this and get the lady. i didn't like the casting and the voiceover. >> actors don't build shelves. they should have found real people who build shelves. >> they can afford shelves. >> exactly. these guys are waiters. they build their abs. they don't build shelves.
by the way, andy, you are a big woodford fan or maybe a big wood fan. the big fallacy here is a product like scotch or whiskey is actually yummy. i love the idea when they show people drinking something like alcohol that is tastes good. it doesn't. >> woodford is delicious. >> alcohol does not taste good. that is a fallacy. i drink it, i know. >> wood forward is delicious. here is the problem. i love woodford. there is no way i can build a bookshelf from scratch. if it is electronic i can get it going or a computer i am good, but building stuff? no. i can't order woodford in bars because i would be misrepresenting myself to the ladies. i am not going to do that. >> false advertising. >> an intellectual roofy. >> i am not surprised this ad debuted during "mad men." the overrated, pseudo
intellectual show -- >> it is pretentious. >> don draper could have written that voiceover. >> and they would have made it sound brilliant. >> everybody would have said, you are such a genius. >> he would have been in a meeting and said build -- men build shelves. women want men who build shelves and then he would have walked out and had an affair with a sad woman. >> but people from woodford would hate the ad and it would have to be explained why it was so genius. >> i want to make two points. first, the big fallacy is -- we know this growing up. the first time we had alcohol we hated the taste. we absolutely hated the taste. we forced ourselves to get beyond drinking beer or whiskey and to appreciate the fact that it tasted horrible. it tasted horrible because it didn't taste like coca-cola and we couldn't drink as much. it is a lie it tastes good. it doesn't taste good, but we still drink it. the other thing, her voice. >> i love her voice. >> what do you call that voice? >> sexy? >> it was rase -- raspy. >> what is the name?
>> it is called the vocal fry. >> it was like she was screaming all night last night. >> she was trying to be like a woodstock poet-like snap your fingers. it was pretentious. >> it, woulded on me. >> every time she said wood i would say i need that wood. >> do you know we never had a woman on this show with a vocal fry. a vocal fry suggests a detachment of like -- >> are you over it. it is like it is so painful. >> they have never been on the show and that's why we have had high ratings. >> it is a vocal fry. it is not the animals. listen producers, you have nothing to do with it. >> i totally agree with you about the disappointment of the taste of alcohol. i was raised mormon and didn't have my first drink until i was 22. i went to byu. i was so disappointed.
i was like i will try wine because i love grape juice. and i said this is like disgusting. it was like acid. >> joanne's first drink was at two. she quit drinking at 22. >> and then started again at 23. >> and then fell off the wagon. >> i love the woodford apology. it is not our intent to offend. some day i want somebody to say, we are glad you were offended that's our point. >> i hate their apology. it makes me sick to my stomach. if students are pale will a university fail? a school in washington state, they have them there, have called the amount of white people on campus a fail a your which makes us wonder -- >> is this racist? >> at western washington university a school wide questionnaire recently asked how do we make sure that in future years we are not as white as we are today?
as campus reform reports the school's president has been banging on about the lack of diversity for awhile. on the school's website bruce shepherd wrote "in the decades ahead should we be as white as we are today? we will be relentlessly driven toward mediocrity or become a sad sad dough of ourselves." he seems like a guy who may think in 10 years from now they are as white as they are today, they will have failed as a university and their commitment to meet the critical needs of the state. >> if we 10 years from now are as white was we are -- as we are today we will have failed to meet the critical needs of our state. [applause]. >> now what is he talking about? >> i mean, what a is he talking about? >> i mean what is he talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> i mean, what is he talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> i mean, what a is he talking about? >> what are they talking about?
>> i mean what is he talking about? >> what are they talking about? >> what are they talking about? >> what are they talking about? >> what are they talking about? >> what are they talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> what is he talking talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> what is he talking about? >> what in the world is he talking about? >> what a is that all about? >> i have to say i don't even know what he is talking about. >> it is good to end on a david corn. what is he talking about? you white people. if you replace the word white with any other ethnicity he would be fired. what is he talking about? >> honestly i don't know what he is talking about. white people are so crazy. i wanted to throw an h in crazy, but it didn't work.
i don't get it. i don't see the big deal. your school is in washington where white people were invented. if you have a school there there are going to be white people there. not to mention there is no sun in washington. vampires can live in the day in washington. so any minorities that go there become white people. that's how washington works. the clouds turn them into white people. >> i did not know this. >> yes, it is the coffee and the stump town and the clouds. it transforms puerto ricans and chinese and black people to white people. that's what happens. >> is that what happened to michael jackson? >> yes! >> i had no idea. >> they sent him to washington. >> it gary, is this racist or just bigoted? >> both. >> great answer. >> i think it really goes against the whole i have a dream that some will be judged by the content of their character and not the color of their skin.
the town where this college is located, it is obviously he hates his own community. he needs to uproot these college and move it somewhere else if he wants to serve a different community. it seems like he is grasping at straws. the other thing is if he really wants to -- i have advice. if he wants to cut back the white people, scratch the polo team, the sailing team, the fencing team. that would help. >> and he should resign. >> that's true. by the way, he is really white. >> he is very white. >> did you see how he dressed? he needs style tips. joanne, you argued in the past that universities should be segregated. why would an all white campus be better, as you put it? >> that's funny to y? >> it wouldn't be better. it would just be ideal. he is like me. he poses the question. how can we do this? what are your ideas?
he doesn't have any of his own. the real matter falls in the office of admissions and the financial aid. you need to make the school more appealing with your out reach to high schools and have financial aid offer better packages to people who can't afford this college. they say they are on the middle tier of schools. so have that middle tier more accessible to everyone. >> the problem is though if you make it more accessible to everyone, and if everyone cannot make it through four years, you are actually hurting them. people get into schools they can't then sustain their grades because they weren't a good enough stownt -- student and it hurts them in the long run. as the only black person on the panel what do you make of this? >> let me tell you what he is talking about. first he is being misunderstood which to be fair is partially his fault. he wasn't really clear. and i think he was deliberately trying to be provocative. he expanded on it in a blog
post. 90% of the students come from washington state. high school graduate numbers in washington state are flat. the percentage of nonwhite graduates is rapidly increasing. so given the demographics if they don't attract more nonwhite students it is going to fail. so that a is his point. that college is a competitive mark a cet. we have more nonwhite students graduating high school and we need to attract them. the second reason this is -- >> are you getting board? >> i had a point. >> the school 1* already becoming less white. the 2013 freshman class was 25% students of color. in 2001 it was 16%. they themselves say this is a long-term trend of increasing number of students of color. they are solving their own problem already. >> they should just try to encourage more -- >> repeat what i said. >> i was thinking of a funny joke. wouldn't it be great if they
just recruited more students named less -- les white. see it was worth it. it was so stupid. it is a stupid joke, but it is funny. >> this is my biggest problem with this was the crowd. how self-loathing are white people that you just say we needless white people, and then a bunch of white people go, yeah! get rid of the whiteys. we are white. do you even think about what is going on? why do we needless white people? why not just more people to go to the school from different races? it doesn't mean we have to take it away. increase enrollment. >> think about the white people who are screwed over by college because they can't afford it. >> it doesn't happen, greg. we can always afford it. we have white skin. that's how it works. this is america, greg. you are not talking about canadians here. >> the problem with student loans is you can get a student
loan and anybody can get them. the problem is it inflates the cost of tuition. it incenti vieses the colleges so the government is blindly handing out loans without differ wren differentiating on the skills of the person and the major. it balloons the cost of tuition. >> is it like 400% since like 1980? it is 400 teams the tuition -- times the tuition and it is not getting any better. that's how you end a segment with a thing like that and a joke about les white. won't that be funny if that was your name. >> i am here to solve the problem. >> i am les white. i should just let that joke float away. coming up, is your toaster plotting to kill ?u the special on murderous household appliances starts tomorrow. what is the most expensive urine in history in we report and you aim carefully.
take joy in smashing his toy? a writer for business insider says he was attacked for wearing google glass. he is adorable. kyle russell just covered an anti-google protest in san francisco and was walking home wearing the high-tech specs. he says suddenly someone gelled gelled -- yell #ed glass and grabbed them from his beautiful face and then ran away. russell understands where the guy was coming from. he writes, quote, anything associated with google has come to represent gentrification in the city, end quote. and because of the company, people are being evicted because of the company -- people are being
evicted or priced out of their homes. he suggested the muggings may be an appropriate response and that he can see how wearing glass after an anti-google protest may not have been the best idea. we asked tech workers to comment. >> that excites us so much when we watch that. i want to wake up with one on my chest. so this guy seems to be apologizing to his muggers for inciting them. >> who does president want -- doesn't want to do that to the first person wearing google glasses. >> i saw one in a bathroom. >> he could be videotaping
you. >> exactly. if i was in there i would be videotaping myself. look, there is a famous celebrity. then i would play it over and over again on my ceiling. >> that's how you learn technique. otherwise how else do you learn? >> the rule is the light has to be on. they make it that way so if the light was not on -- at least that's what they say. >> you know what, i don't know that. i just think oh my gosh somebody is wearing that and staring at me. >> for all we know this reporter could have been acting like a glass hole. >> he admits he was a symbol and he got what he deserved. that's stupid to me. would he feel the same way if they stole his ipod? >> the other thing is we have to isolate the variable. google glass versus glasses in general, have you ever read "lord of the flies"? we have been picking on people with glasses. this is why i got lasik.
>> we pick on people who wear glasses when they don't need to. when you see some kid wearing glasses and there are no actual glass inside -- >> the one that hang off the tip of their nose? >> that is actually adorable. but don't you want to knock it off their head? what are you doing? i'm fine with this violence. >> violence against men with eye problems fnlt you people -- you people make me sick to my stomach. they went on sale these google glasses. are you going to purchase one and further your reputation as a pre pretentious geek? >> i will pass on glass as they say. greg, i was offered to be part of the google explorer program and i passed on it. >> i know, he was. >> nothing worse than a geek snob. he is a geek snob. >> i didn't get them. $1500, are you kidding me?
it is ridiculous. >> we would have paid for it. >> obviously you should be able to walk down the street of the city wearing google glass without getting them ripped off. i get what he is say whg he says says -- when he says it may not have been a good idea to wear them after an anti-google march. that's just common sense given the behavior of a lot of people in the culture. unless are you looking for a fight maybe lay low. >> he looks like he was looking for a fight. look at him. >> he goes further when he says i can see why the person who smashed my glasses, what they did. that's blaming the vic -- victim. that is crossing to she shouldn't have worn that short skirt territory. >> i have other things i can say. i agree. >> she is saying the message is like saying -- >> if you say i understand why he would do such a thing, you
are then saying the victim is responsible for what happened which is a lot of times what people say about women who are harassed and raped. she was asking about it for what she was wearing. >> that's a nice blouse. >> would you stop it? >> sometimes if someone takes my umbrella or something i will think, well i hope they really needed it. >> that is the karma. that's karma. >> totally. >> when i see him selling the umbrella for a buck to buy some crack i am really happy. >> what about the guy who smashed his glasses with a part of gentrification and he is trying to work out his issues. maybe he was just an ass. maybe there isn't a bigger protest that he is trying to do. >> these protests are idiotic. they should be thanking google for creating jobs and helping bolster a bad economy, right? >> absolutely.
they are making a vibrant city, culture. >> people being evicted will be celebrating. >> who is going to be evicted? >> people who can't afford the jacked up rent. >> that happens everywhere. >> you are saying they should be celebrating it. >> they should be celebrating the jobs, but they are making a fuss and it is capitalism. >> they probably still use google. >> they look for new apartments. >> google is where the demonstration should be. google maps. what's wrong, andy? >> nothing. >> you know what this is? i have to defend google glass. isn't it almost in the same realm of vaping? they think i hate that person because he is doing something i am not doing. so i hate google glass, but at the same time i'm going, i get the same kind of heat. >> you vape? >> yes. i had a kid at a restaurant
grab his parents and go look, look at him. he is smoking. i am sitting there smoking a thing -- i haven't had a real cigarette in five months. i am looking at the kid and it is like, what are you doing? then the kid got up and he hit my table and sat down and staired. stared. i was like, f this and continued smoking until they left. >> you know what will solve this? google is making google contacts. >> then we won't know they are looking at us. that will make me even more disgusted. >> it forces your eye to become a red light when it is being used. >> creepy. >> really? >> all right, coming up, what from we doing? we will talk about all sorts of things like the alamo. a guy went to jail for urinating on the alamo. for how long? a longtime. that's the tease, her --
i am greg gutfeld, host of tonight's "red eye" debate. the gloss posted an article saying celebrities are wearing a lot of dumb things at coachella and bendies are the worse. vanessa hugens and selena gomez have been wearing the hindi spiritual cymbal. everyone is wearing the bindi. no fashion costumes is complete without a cultural appropriation. that's the word these days. but is the appropriation a tribute or a slap in the jeweled face? for more on coachella let's go to our youth correspondent.
>> dude, are you like 40 years old. get a job. andy, you are a lonely lurd -- nerd -- or lurd for short that clung to comic books as your own friends. now super heros, the one you enjoyed, are loved by jocks. can you sympathize with those offended? >> it is not true, greg. the motoheads, dweeds, they all love me. it is from ferris bueller, do none of you get that? i get the cultural appropriation argument. sometimes it makes sense and sometimes it doesn't. usually with music it doesn't. i have a lot of stories i can tell you, but i am not going to. >> thank god. >> the bottom line is these celebrities look like idiots. they are wearing something as a fashion accessory that has a lot of religious meanings for hindus. christians would be upset if
people did it with a cross. >> madonna does it. >> she is christian. >> oh, is she? >> talking talking about cultural appropriation, kabbalah. can we put up this picture from coachella? this is jarod leto wearing see bra pants and a muscle tee. give me a bindi any day. >> he culturally prop -- appropriated my heart. >> zebras don't wear human pants. >> they would if they could, but they are too stupid. they can't invent. they can't even sew. they don't have thumbs. so stupid sometimes, andy. joe app, why are you -- joanne, why are you an intoll rebt -- intolerant bigot? >> let me count the ways. this is what celebrities do when they go to things like this. they are like, yea, my publicist is here with me and i will do everything to get them upset.
for the most part fashion -- these celebrities have to take risks now. they are competing with gaga and cyrus. what can i do that is boarder line offensive and still cool. this is the next thing. >> they are selective about what is cool. for example i had a co-worker who had prayer flags in the office and that is trendy. maybe a christian brought a picture of jesus or bible versus. i am not religious, but that would be considered as something awkward. >> that's not cool. >> it is a double standard. the real question is when are we going to see miley cyrus or whoever in a burka? >> that would be amazing and quite arousing. >> or a pant suit. >> or just pants. >> what is this generation coming to? andrew, let's talk about this idea of approprations being bad. we can eat their food. i go to an indian restaurant
and i am appropriating and digesting and pooping. >> painfully. >> and we go back. i swore after swearing i would never go again. after wondering why are you torturing me for a day. it is like i have intestinal amnesia. >> how did we get here? >> approprations. i just don't understand why appropriation is wrong. every time i go abroad there is always a guy in a dennis rodman bulls jersey that is coming up to me and going, listen, kanye west, kanye west trying to get me to listen to music that he knows i listened to five years ago. i don't scold him. how dare you put on dennis the diplomat rodman's jersey. i would never say that. i say that's cool you are doing our stuff. they get upset when we do their stuff for some weird reason. what does the bindi mean?
do we know? >> there are lots of meanings. it has been morphed in the culture. >> it depends on the color. >> of course, color, yada, yada, yada, who cares? we don't take it for the meaning. we like cool. if the stuff looks cool, we will take it. that's why we haven't taken the burka. it don't look cool. >> it will one of these days. >> we are taking something that is meaningful to them and using it as a fashion. >> oh poo. a big fat poo. >> they are used to white people taking things. >> i think the difference is the way it is being used -- it is being used appropriately if i may say. they are not using it to do something grotesque. like madonna -- >> madonna is offensive in what she does. madonna is offensive. she does all kinds of things to christian symbols and wearing it appropriately on your forehead i don't see it as a problem.
>> if you believe appropriation is wrong shouldn't coachella be closed because all music is appropriated basically from black music, right? rock and roll is an appropriation of black music. any rock and roll that a is played at coachella is insulting and offensive. >> i think what they are -- why they are worried about appropriation is because when white people appropriate something, we make it not cool. >> it is not appropriate. >> what a is going on? >> i don't know. sometimes she has a seizure. she just repeats things. she hillary pete parts of a -- she will repeat parts of a show that happened weeks ago and it will oddly make sense. do you want us to put the tongue guard in? there we go. what happened? such an interesting topic. it has fallen apart. don't think of leaving me
now. the "new york times" best seller , you can get it at amazon.com. i will be at the nixon library. i think there are tickets available. that's in southern california. i think it is loma linda? san clemente? you can find out by going to g gutfeld.com and find out the details of the nixon library and you can buy autographed copies of my book.
>> is this evil? >> according to page six part of a newspaper, the wrap party at a club in l.a. could have been a scene straight from the film. there were lots of beautiful women and shots of tequilla were passed around all night. they couldn't make it, but kevin conley showed up on crutches no less. what a trooper. the creator of the monstrosity posted the pick on instagram because he is hip. it reads, quote, not everyone is as tough as kevin conley. he is a trooper. he was able to make it to the wrap party a week after surgery. oh well, their loss. and america's gain. andrew, the idea of an "entourage" movie can we get anymore evil? and why are you showing andy? >> he said andrew. >> are you drunk down there? >> i don't see why it is evil. >> did you like "entourage"?
>> i like the parts of "entourage" -- you don't like any show where like the guy gets laid. >> why would we watch that a? i saw an awkward weird owe go -- weirdo going -- confident man on the channel. >> was that an impression of me? it was a good one. >> it is guys partying and there are girls that like them. >> you hit the nail on the head. that's why i don't leak it. like it. i don't need to see people having a better time than me. i don't need that. i need to be -- you are right. i need to see people in misery. carrie, agree with me. "entourage" pretends -- it is not pretentious. >> it is low brow. i have never, ever -- i admit i never watched an episode of "entourage." >> here is my impression of
it? >> what's up dude. >> what's up? >> good to see you. >> great. >> work. >> yeah. >>sex with those chicks ? >> lunch at my house. >> "entourage" theater. >> do you think this is your house some. >> it has been embarrassing when i go to the doctor. >> it is crazy. joanne, i notice you were not in the instagram photo -- >> i was in the bathroom. >> i don't know what the line is on this show. >> there is no line. if there is a line it was snorted. joanne, you seem you would addition for a role in "entourage." >> yeah, i think every actor would think that is the dream show. yeah, we get to be cool on tv
and be this cool in real life and go to the party after we were played being at the party. wouldn't you rather be on "game of thrones" or" mad men" because it is a character piece. it is a timepiece. i don't understand -- >> it takes no skill whatsoever. >> their skill is they untuck their shirt and they walk down an alley together and they are on the phone. >> yes, exactly. >> i wasn't even looking. >> that was amazing. >> they think he was looking. >> that freaked me out. defend your favorite show. >> hell no. >> what do you hate? >> i can't believe adrian, jeremy piven, how do you miss the rap party? i know he has his environmental work and his two bands, the honey brothers and kid friendly, but what could jeremy piven have better to do? it is not possible he had
something better to do. >> shave his back. >> and it is disrespectful to the cast. it is disrespectful to the crew to not make an appearance. the problem was it was bad enough with the bros watched the show, no offense to you. now it is aging bros. it is aging bros who are going to this movie and there is nothing sadder than aging bros. >> they already were aging bros. when "entourage" was fading with the recession. it was hard to watch people drive maseratis while nobody is working. that's just me. >> i think you are absolutely right. we went from watching people in maseratis to watching people in duck camouflage. that's literally where it shifted. i can't watch this. it makes me feel bad. these guys don't have teeth? i have teeth. >> that's why i don't get it. why can hollywood be so 1% and it is okay. they can donate to these democrats and they are all 1% and somehow that 1% is all right to drive maseratis.
business network. a new "red eye" returns tomorrow with jim norton. >> e block. last story. that's the last story. >> as munich -- has munich gone nudist? it is not far from the main square where the park goers can unwind without fear of tan lines. germans have a reputation for being nudist obsessive and they are crowded with the germs. observes one writer striping off in public is the voluntary removal of a heavy mass. 5* return to the honesty rather than a peek a boo. has germany got it right or have we got it wrong? >> it is germany. it is munich. they are trying way too hard. they are trying to make munich the next spring break destination. but it is a bunch of old people. the cia fact book says germany is the fourth oldest country in terms of median age.
itthey have beer, but that's pretty much all they got. >> 90% of people should not even be seen naked. they should screen them first. >> she is a snob. >> we need to lower the standards. are you married yet? >> no. >> lower the standards. go to munich. get one of those burrelly, hairy guys with the wooden shoes. i don't know if that's the right country. and then drink yourself something and get yourself a man and get a baby in that stomach. a lot of young people in germany germany -- not a lot of young people in germany and this is how it will happen. >> you can be a 6 ed teacher. >> i knew they were in the stomach. >> joe -- joanne, you hate adult flesh.
>> there is a certain age. >> you have to let your sausage breathe. that's what i hear. >> andy, should the u.s. adopt the same policy? >> i don't understand how they will do this in germany. where will i pin my yellow star? >> awful joke. >> it is going to be painful. >> you are terrible. >> wow. i am going to leave that in. >> good, i want it left in. never forget, greg. >> oh i get it now. >> you know what i like about you? you have such a lack of history. that was like you didn't have any idea. you thought babies live in the snow. >> i was saying is that a fashion trend? >> where are you performing next? >> this weekend at the comic strip live in new york.
hello everyone. i'm greg gutfeld along with andrea tantaros, dana perino, bob beckle, and eric boling. this is "the five." yeah, it's tax day or for 70 million households, tuesday. because for them, they pay no federal income tax so they are left wondering why everyone is at the post office sweating through their shirts. i don't blame them. i envy them. a tax for them is like a coupen from head and shoulders if you are bald. not that i don't love