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LIBRARY COMPANY 


PHILADELPHIA. 


5 IT 

Cotamtria ©tri&etfftp 

m^fCtipofHtttgork 



Bequest of 

Frederic Bancroft 


1860-1945 







%AT{^A> 13 & I 



THE 




POOR MAN’s ADVICE 

TO HIS 

POOR NEIGHBOURS: 


BALLAD, 

To the Tune of Chevy-Chace. 


N E W-Y 0 RK: 

Printed in the Year M.DCC.LXXIV. 



Poor Man’s ADVICE, &c. 


A H! have you read, my neighbours dear. 
Our famous Congrefs Book ? 

Alas! I grievoufly do fear 
I They have our cafe miftook. 

II. 


What pity *tis, fuch worthy men 
Who’ve larntto read, and write. 

And caft accounts; Ihould ufe their pen, 
I For to undo us quite. 


'i never faw a King, or Queen, 

Save Indian Kings, in Stroud, 

But I’ve feen folks, who Kings have feen. 
Who fay, they’re defp’rate proud. 

A 2 


( 4 ) 


IV. 

But our King George is juft and good, 

If one dar’d ipeak out plain, 

And when he’s forced to lhed blood, 

He feels purdigious pain. 

V. 

When this book gets to London-town, 
And is Ihow’d to the King, 

I will lay any man a crown. 

He’ll grieve, like any thing. 

VI 

To hear, fuch whimper, and fuch whine, 
No man can tell him why; 

And ’caufe his Royal Hand muft fign 
That fome poor foul's muft die. 

VII. 

Lord! how the Parliament men will curfe 
’ To find themfelyes io mawl’d; 

Like foot-pad, or like vile cut-purfe 
‘ They’re all to nought be call’d. 

vm. 

As if a pack of rafeals, they 
‘ Mind not what’s wrong or right;, 

£ut vote, for fo much by the Day, 1 ' 

J As our Provincials fight. 



( 5 ) 


26f 


IX. 

As who nor law, nor gofpel know, 

Altho’ at college bred, 

And as the folks in Europe trow. 

In larned books deep read. 

As men, who only have a fmatch 
Of knowledge, for parade, 

And for our Gcngrefs are no match 
In politics, or trade. 

XI. 

The Canagans too, whom they addrcfi. 
And treat fo very blunt; 

Will cry, while as they crofs their breafts, 
Jefu! quel gros affront! 

XII. 

If to obey King George they pleafe, 

For what is all this fufs? 

And love him more than Lewy Seaft, 
Pray what harm’s that to us ? 

XIII. 

lie gracioufly, their laws reftor’d. 

Which they had long befought; 

For which, he is by them ador’d, 

As every good King ought. 



( 6 ) 


Oh! what fad Kings, we’d formerly' 
They took a wicked maggot; 

To make men with their faith comply. 
They ufed fire, and faggot. 


Now Fox’s book of Marturs faith. 

It is a dreadful thing, 

Te be oblig’d to change one’s faith. 

For any earthly King. 

XVI. 

If Algerines Ihould take this city, 

And for our faith, defpife us, 

^Twould be a burning lhame, and pity, 

If they Ihould circumcife us. 

XVII. 

To the whole world, S tis natural 
To love, their ancient ufes, 

Of thefe they’re full as chary all. 

As we of our prepuces. 

XVIII. 

Had Barron Defcow took this town, 

In fifty-fixth’s hard froft, 

What Ihould we’ve thought, if the French crown 
Had given back, all we loft. 



( 7 ) 




XX. 

XXL 

SaSS“' 

They will notcareaf-t. ’ 


xxiri. 



( 8 ) 


XXIV. 

Don’t you remember, t’other day 
They talk’d of war with Spain; 
’Bout Falkland’s Ifland, as they fay, 
A yaftway o’er the main. 


Lord, how did England rage and roar. 
About a foolifli rudder 
A war they’d have, by G-d, they fwore. 
And make proud Spain to Ihudder. 

XXVI. 

Proud Spain was foon to reafon brought* 
For fear of Britifh thunder. 

And though it was a bitter draught. 
Yet did proud Spain knock under. 


As bitter a draught it was, ’tis true. 

As I,pi,ca,cu,an,ha, 

But Spain remember’d fixty-two. 

As how flie loft Havanna. 

XXVIII. 

Now isn’t this book a much worfe thing 
Than that fame foolifli rudder-. 

And by affronting fo their King, 

Will they not make us Ihudder ? 



( 9 ) - ' 

XXIX. 

They work* for Eaft and Weft-Indies; 

For Ruffia, and for Spain; 

For ev’ry land, under the Ikies, 

And trade o’er all the main. 


XXX; 


Yet when the ftrangc refolves we’ve made}. 
Are known to that proud nation, 

Tho’ they’ve enough of other, trade, . 
Lord; what a. furipus pafiion ?, 


kxxi: 


Then for to block our port within; 

Out comes their Ihips fo ftout. 
And fince we will let nothing in, 
They will let nothing oiit. . 


XXXII. 


Trom December, the very firft day; 

The Delegates fay plum; 

Our wives lhan’t have a duft more tea; 
Nor we a drop more rum. " l, “ 


XXXlit. 


They’ve tea in plenty forthemfelves; 

And other good things too, 

But we, alas, poor wretched elves. 

Shall not know what to do 4 

.' 




( *o ) 


XXXIV. 

They’ve all laid in great flock of things. 
To laft them inanya year. 

For they’re as rich as any Kings, 

But what fhall poor folks wear ? 


They’ll ride in coach imd chariot fine, 
And go to ball, and play; 

When we’ve not wherewithal to dine, 
Though we work-hard all day. 


Our members are good men, and true, 
And plans full wife propos’d. 

Their country’s goodTor topurfue, 
But Eaft and South oppos’d. 

XXXVII. 

If New-York votes, none of th’ other 
Did contradifi quite flat ; 1 - . 

I do (for all dus J mighty pother) 

Betpn to frncll a rat.. 

xxxvm. ’ 

The laft Non-imporrfclo but lurch) 
While Phil, and weohey’dj 

The reft all left us in thp lurch, 

And drove a fmoaking cade. 




( U ) 


XXXIX. 

I fear this noife about, a tatf, - 
Is all a downright flam, 

For any but a Smuggler, ax. 

They did not care a d-mn. 

XL. _ ■ . 

Ah! God forgive thefc wicked men. 
To judge hard, I am loath; . 

But they don’t boggle now and then. 
To break a fwinging oath.. 


If all be true our Clargy lay. 

And what all good men tell, 
Alas! at the great judgment day. 
They’ll all be d—-dtoh-lL 


We know full well, that Bolton tews. 
For many a hundred cheft. 

Paid three pence duty, to the Crown, 
And grumbl’d not the leaft. 

XLm. 

Thefe wicked men did thaaperfuade. 
To tell afoolifh Be, 

And fwear by G-d, that them all m i3t> 
Twas inadvertantly. 



('. It l 


XLIV. 

Ah what a fhame, that pious town, 
Should do a thing fo odd,. 

To turn all traitors to the Crown, 
And rebels to their God.- 


Oh would to God, they’d think betimes. 
Before affairs grow worle, 

And make atonement for their crimes ,] 
By forrovy and remorfe. ' 


XL VI. 

So may he mercifully fave. 

That very godly city, . 

To lofe all in the world we have, 

Is finely a great pity. 

1 XL VII. 

And now, my Friends, lets warn’d be 
By th eir unhappy fate, 

To live ‘ in fweet'tranqvlility 
And trouble not the ftate. 

XL VIII. 

For if our worthy General Gage, 
Whom we do all well know. 

Should the NewfEnglanders engage, 
And finally o’erthrow. . ; ' * . 




XLIX. 

He ? d greve to’s heart, if order’d here 
Againft his old fiends .to fight. 

He was Jong time, our townfman dear j 
Twou’d be a dreadful fight. 


If by a maracle in war, 

New-England, fhou’d beat him; . 

They’d come by thoufands, far and near, 
And us moft foundly trim., 


They have already? - feiz’d opr land, 
And Penn’s too, as they fay ; 
Now if they get, the upper hand* 
Ther’ll be the'duce to pay. . 


Then muft we feed, on fait and Sweet, 
And drink, four cyder too 
If cought on fabbath, in theftreet,. 

Be flogged, black and blue. 

LIU. 

And then no living foul will dare, 

To take a pleafant ride 
To Kingfbridge, or Harlem fo fair, ]/ 
By his dear fweetheart’s fide. 



b *4 ) 


JJV. 

Then muft we, five whole hours a ftretch, 
Hear their grim pallors whine,- 
And muffle, and cant, and bawl-, arid preach. 
While as we want to dine. 


The jolly Bofton failors fay, 

They dare not for their lives. 

If from long voyage, they land that day, 
Embrace their own dear wives. 


LVI. 


With fuch queer folks, have nought to do 
But follow, your old courfe, 

Kifs them on mon ? and funday too, 

And frolick, foot, and hoife. 

LVII. 

The next time, that we want redrefs. 

For any difeontent, 

Our own Affemblies, fhould addrefs 
The Britilh Parliament. 

LVIII. 

I have over heard, fome flyboots fwear 
The Congrefs, was a Hum, 

To make old women, and children fear, 
As once, at fee, fa, fum. 



v ( 15 ) ^ '-3 


LIX. - ■ 

Suppofe, all truth, the Congrefs fay, 
N o doubt, they make the word; -, 
Can we, my Friends, for many a day, 
Be fo completely curft. 


As have no cloaths, no grog,_ no tea. 
To cheer our drooping fpirits; 

And fnugin clover, fmugglers fee. 
Who have not half our merits. 

LXI. 

Ifn’t it, now a pretty-ftory, 

One fmells it in a trice, . 

If I fend wheat, I am a Tory,, 

But Charles-towfi, may fent RICE. 


The Congrefs, fay, you’ll all things fell 
As for a twelvemonth pafty 
But don’t we know, my friends, full well, 
That this is all my a--e. 

LXlII. 

If we to give that price, be willing, 

And go unto aftore •, 

Inftead of one, they ,ax two Hulling, 

And turn us, but of door. 




■ ( 16 :) 

LXIV. 

Now fliould v»t raife, the price of work j- 
Or of our own produce, 

They’d look as fierce, as any Turk, 

And fend us, to the duce. :: . 

ixv. • 

Indeed, indeed, it’s very wicked, - 
For men, who an’t all Fools,' 

To think, that we dtrfbeTb tricked^ ■ 
And made fuch‘ harraht fodlsd - - 

LXVfi - . 

Oh? my dear friends, my blood does bbif* 
To fee men, fo impofe, •- 
Bend us, it will, like pliant Coil j > : 

And lead us by the: nofe. • 


LXIVI. 1 

If any Lord, of Common, or’King,- 
Had fettowork, his head, : 

He coudrt’f have done, fo bad a thing. 

As take away, ones bread. > 

Lxvni. : ; 

Rare fons of freedom, this Congrefs! 

So juft as they think right. 

We are to eat,— drink,-Troliek,—dr«fi -J 
Pray matters, may we f--'-e. 



( i7 ) 


LXIX. " 

For this, they poft in every city, 

A pack of dreadful fpies: 

Did ever fcheme, fo mighty pretty, 
Inquigifnon devife ? 

LXX. 

If by juft wrath, the devil was fent, 

To rule thefe fair countries, 

A greater curfe, he cou’dn’t invent. 

Than to encourage fpies. 

LXXI. 

Than bid men, who fhould live like brothers. 
To pry, both night and day, ’ 

And keep near watch,upon each other. 

Each other to betray. 

LXXII. 

Our own dear homes lhall be no more 
Our caftles, as of old ; 

But grim infpedtors burft our door, 

And every tale be told 

LXXIII. 

In the Gazette; of what we drink, 

Or eat, or buy, or fell. 

Or-fay, or do, look, dream, or think; 

Oh! what a perfed hell. 

C 



( i8 ) 


LXXIV. 


I’d rather be a Galley Slave, 

Be chained hand and foot, 
Lofe every precious limb I have, 
Than to fubmit unto’t. 


Shades of De Witts! our fouls infpire, 
Their threatnings to defpife ; 

Let’s do what God, what laws require, 
And laff at Congrefs lpies. 

LXXVI. 

Monfters, ftand off! avaunt! beware! 

My doors ye lhall not burft; 
Magiftrates only enter there: 

Oh G-d ! I’ll perilh firft. 

LXXVII. 

Ye Good, ye Wife, ye Rich, ye Great, 
Thefe mad Refolves revurfe, 

Stand forth ! Oh quit your mean retreat; 
Remember Meroth’s curie. 

LXXVIII. 

Stand forth! and fave thefe happy lands, 
Ere ’tis, alas! too late; 

Pppofe all lawlefs mad commands. 
Tremble at Bolton’s fate. 



( i9 ) 


LXXIX. 

Arife ! (hake off the Congrefs yoke; 

Act as Freemen becomes. 

Their book is blufter all, and fmoke, 
Ah ! wipe with it your b- : —s. 


If blind,you’ll bow your humble pates, 
Like moles,, and deaf .as done. 

To their High MightinelV mandates, 

I fliall your fate bemoan. 

LXXXI 

And weeping pray, on.reverent knees. 
That God will pleafed be, 

To burn the Corigrefies decrees, 

• And blaft" their tyranny. 

LXXXII. 

But, Oh! God blefs our honed King, 
The Lords and Commons true. 
And if nexttongrefs is the thing,' 

Oh! bids that Congrefs too. 


FINIS.